Calling in The One By Katherine Woodward Thomas

Calling in “The One” By Katherine Woodward Thomas

I first bought Calling in The One 10 years ago when I was 27 and eager to settle down. It’s funny how back then I was already worried that I will end up single and unmarried unless I took drastic action. Cue the purchase of many programs and books in an attempt to meet and marry my soulmate. Well, I’m 37 and I still haven’t met and married my soulmate.

The truth is,  I didn’t really read the book back then… and I didn’t really do any of the programs designed to get me my soulmate. Katherine Woodward Thomas states at the beginning of this book that if you find yourself going months without finishing the program then you have to assess if a loving relationship is really something that you want. I guess back then I still had too many barriers to love. It took me 10 years to finally start and finish Calling in The One. When I had tried previously, I would hit a wall around week 3 of the program and give up.

What changed this time? I took a 100-day challenge to meet a few goals before my 37th birthday and one of the goals was to meet my soulmate. I committed to doing and finishing the program and I really did it. Maybe this time around I am really ready to meet and marry my soulmate. 

How Calling In The One Works

The book is divided into 49 lessons so that you do a lesson every day. She recommends that you carve out 30 minutes every morning to do so. There is the daily lesson reading followed by a practice and a bonus practice. The bonus practices can be done at a later day but this time around I was super committed, so I did both the practices and the bonus practices.

Calling in “The One” By Katherine Woodward Thomas
Will you call in the one in 49 days? This post reviews Calling in The One By Katherine Woodward Thomas.

Activities And Exercises

What kind of practices are you instructed to do in the book? They range from meditations, lots of journaling exercises and a few practical ones like asking someone directly for what you need, forgiving others and so on. I can be a bit lazy, so the meditation exercises were the most exciting for me. I had to push through the journaling exercises, but they were very valuable. I learned a lot about myself from them.

Does Calling In The One Work?

Well, I did complete the 7 weeks of the exercises and drumrolls, please… I didn’t meet and marry my soulmate. However, I am closer to doing so now than I have ever been. I came to realize how limited my view of love is and that I can practice showing love to my family and roommates as I get ready for my soulmate. I am more in touch with who I am and what I need to be happy. My boundaries are stronger.  

I believe the main aim of calling in the one is for the reader to identify the resistance they have towards loving relationships and marriage. For me, it is that I have been feeling I am not good enough and through the exercises in Calling in The One I have come to the realization that I am good enough, perfect even, for the love of my life. And until I am united with my soulmate, I will love myself unconditionally and create a life that lights me up.

The Top Lessons I Learned From The Book.

  1. Practice the love qualities you are seeking in your soulmate on those in your life already. For example, I want a kind and generous man, but I realized that I wasn’t very kind and generous to those already in my life. I have now been working on that. As Katherine says, the only thing missing in our lives is that which we ourselves are not giving.
  2. Give yourself what you want your soulmate to give you. In my case, I need to spoil and indulge myself the same way I expect my soulmate to spoil me. I am now getting used to being spoilt and proudly confess to being a spoilt woman.
  3. You are the only one that will always be with you so you have to give yourself some slack and love yourself unconditionally. From reading the book it is now very clear for me that I will always choose myself and love myself unconditionally. I fight for myself, prioritize my concern and am in my own corner. There is no way I will abandon myself ever again or put myself down in favor of someone else. I am loyal and committed to myself and listen to myself
  4. I am now very determined about setting and enforcing boundaries in order to protect myself.
  5. I have learned to shamelessly ask for what I want and state my position without caring what others think
Will you call in the one in 49 days? This post reviews Calling in The One By Katherine Woodward Thomas.
Will you call in the one in 49 days? This post reviews Calling in The One By Katherine Woodward Thomas.

Memorable Quotes From Calling In The One

  1. A person who wants to create a loving relationship in the near future behaves differently from a person who identifies themselves as being a failure in relationships
  2. We usually get what we anticipate.
  3. It is so important to have integrity with your word. It trains the universe. When we say one thing and then do another, say things that we don’t really mean, or consistently break our word to both others and ourselves, we profoundly diminish our capacity to create the lives that we are hoping to create.
  4. An important part of being marriageable is to be a maker; a person who cultivates a life of beauty, rich texture, and creative work.
  5. The healing and recovery for all addictive behaviors include learning to cultivate a discipline of telling the truth, first to oneself and then to others.
  6. Do you know who usually ends up with great people? Other great people.

In summary, if you want to get married in 7 weeks i.e. by the time you finish this book, I can’t promise that you will. Will the book prepare you to be a better lover? Yes Definitely. My life really is better as a result of reading the book so I would recommend it. Have you read the book? Let me know what you think in the comments below.

How To Set Annual Goals On Your Birthday

Goals for my 38th Year

Birthday Goal Setting 

Birthdays are a great time to carry out a life inventory and reflect on whether or not you are happy with the life you are living. If you are satisfied with your daily life then you can continue doing what you have been doing. However, if you are miserable, then you can change your life by making new goals that would lead you to the life you want.  

This October I turned 37. My 36th year was not pretty; I was unemployed, uninspired and depressed for most of it. Almost no area of my life was working. I am determined to have a better year and never again be in the dire straits I was in the last year. To get different results then, of course, I must do everything differently.  

I also came to the realization that I have never truly savored my life even when things were awesome. I went to college in Switzerland and the UK and looking back now those were awesome days but even then, I would still get depressed! I’ve wasted precious years not savoring my blessings and living my best life. The goal, therefore, is to enjoy every moment I am alive and make every day that I’m alive awesome by design.  

Goal Setting Process 

I used information from the 100-day challenge by Gary Ryan Blair, YouTuber Aaron Doughty, and Jon and Missy Butcher’s Lifebook to set goals for my 38th year. 

Jon and Missy Butcher suggest that you set goals in 12 areas of your life (Health and Fitness, your Intellectual Life, your Emotional Life, your Character, your Spiritual Life, your Love Relationships, Parenting, Social Life, Financial, Career, Quality of Life, and Life Vision). 

I set goals in all the 12 categories, but I focussed on three areas that need urgent attention: My Finances, My Career, and My Character. 

Goal Setting Steps 

During the process of setting goals, I used the below steps: 

  1. I went through all the 12 areas of the Lifebook and exposed and discounted the limiting beliefs I carry in each area (I will cover limiting beliefs in a different post).
  2. Next, I wrote down everything that I want in each life category. I was like a kid who believes anything is possible. When setting goals ask your inner child what they desire in each area. Write down your deepest desires.  
  3. Write your goal in a specific, measurable and time-bound language. e.g. “My goal is to bank 5000 dollars a month by March 1st, 2020” 
  4.  Ask yourself why you must achieve each goal. This is the purpose behind the vision. Why do I want that? What am I going to gain if I achieve that, and what am I going to lose if I don’t? Gary Blair states that purpose is important because it’s what makes you get up in the morning and do the work to change your life.  
  5. Write down your strategies to achieve each goal. I identified 5 action steps for each of my goals. 
  6. Finally, and this is the most important step, I thought about the version of me that has achieved these goals and I became that person. What time does the Kenyangal who makes $5000 a month wake up? What does she eat? How does she speak? Walk? Eat? etc.  

To achieve my goals, I have to be that person every day. I learned this from Aaron Doughty. Many people recommend acting as if you have achieved a goal. This is one step better: Being as if. 

Below is an example of how the final result would look like. These are my goals for my 38th Year. 

Kenyangal’s 38th Year Goals 

  1. I will easily bank 5000 dollars a month by February 28th, 2020 through my writing and business. 
  2. I will easily pray, meditate and read the bible daily. 
  3. I will easily socialize with a friend once a week and with family once a week 
  4. I will easily read and summarise one book a week 
  5. I will easily maintain a constant daily vibration of joy and love 
  6. I will easily weigh 69 kgs by September 30th, 2020 
  7. I will easily get engaged to my soulmate by December 31st, 2020 
  8. I will easily connect with my nieces and nephews once a week. 
  9. I will easily relocate to Canada by September 30th, 2020 

Who Must I Be Daily To Achieve My Goals? 

I am Mrs. MK (MK is the man I have a crush on and would love to marry 😊) these are the qualities I need to display daily to achieve my goals this year. 

1. I must be Prayerful and Spiritually Connected 

2. I must be Successful, Wealthy and Abundant 

3. I must be Fun, Playful and Joyful 

4. I must be Healthy, Fit and Beautiful 

5. I must be Loving, Generous, Compassionate, Forgiving 

6. I must be Righteous, Honest and always do the right thing 

7. I must be Fearless, Bold and Shameless 

9. I must be Committed and Persistent 

10. I must be Self-Controlled and Disciplined 

Well, A very Happy Birthday to me and may I achieve all I aim for this year.   

What are some of the goals you have and who are you being to achieve them? Let me know in the comments. 

I will also constantly update this post with my results.

Think Before You Think! Your Thoughts Have Consequences

Think Before You Think

Are you aware that every thought you think either takes you towards your goals or away from your goals? Every. Single. Thought. I was forced to learn this lesson after years of undisciplined thinking resulted in me losing confidence in my skills and abilities and finding myself in a financial black hole. This is after years of abundance created by undisciplined positive thinking (I was a happy child and teenager hence by default my thoughts were always cheery 🙂 )

Right now you are where your previous thoughts have brought you, and you’re headed where your current thoughts are taking you. If you want a better life than you are currently experiencing you will have to improve your thinking.  Upgrade your thinking for your next level.

Your Thoughts Betray You

How scary would it be if other people could see the thoughts that run through your head on a daily basis? Well here’s the thing, they can clearly see the results of the thoughts you have been thinking. For example, a poor person is displaying the results of negative and scarcity laden thoughts and an overweight person is displaying thoughts of laxity and indiscipline. Your life is as good as the dominating thoughts in your head. We may not be able to see your thoughts, but the evidence of your thoughts is out here for us to see.

Think Before You Think
Think Before You Think

Renew your mind – Think Differently

Knowing how important your thoughts are, you have to be very intentional about what you think. Choosing thoughts that empower you and propel you towards your goals is one of the easiest and most effective actions you can take to change your life. You have to be the one in charge of your thoughts. Don’t automatically think thoughts fed to you by your environment, i.e. friends and family, social media, traditional media e.t.c. Be deliberate about using your thinking to create the life you desire.

How can you do this?

  1. Read books by positive minds that will help change your thinking, for example the bible, biographies of people you admire and Self development books
  2. Surround yourself with positive people that are doing better than you. If everyone in your circle is more successful than you you will upgrade your thinking to their level
  3. Spend time visualizing about achieving your goals and living your ideal lifestyle
  4. Ask yourself empowering questions e.g. why do I want to achieve particular goals or how can achieve my desires
  5. Recite affirmations and prayers that build your faith and confidence.

Reverse the consequences of Negative Thinking

How can you reverse the effects of Negative and Undisciplined thinking? The good news is that starting right now you can begin creating a new life by thinking better thoughts.

  1. Decide to think as God told us to think, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
  2. Whenever you think a negative thought cancel it immediately by replacing it with a positive thought. For example, if you see a beautiful dress and a thought crosses your mind that you can’t afford it, replace it immediately by affirming what Joseph Murphy suggests: God is my instant and everlasting supply and I will get that dress by diving order. Each time a negative thought comes up you cancel it and they will start reducing in number.

Don’t take your thinking for granted, you are literally what you think.

How To Get Your Kenyan E-Passport Within 30 Days Or Less

What is the E-passport?

The Kenyan E-Passport is a new biometric passport that that contains the bearer’s biometric data in digital format. This digital information is registered with the International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO) hence making tracking citizens easier for the world governments 😊.

It has been issued since September 2017 and replaces the old generation ones that will be phased out by March 1, 2020. The Epassport is light blue in colour and as an East African Community Passport it allows it’s bearer to travel visa free to Tanzania, Uganda, Rwanda and Burundi.

E-passport Kenya Deadline

Kenyans will be unable to travel using old passports from 1 September 2019 hence have to obtain the epassport before then. Many countries will probably stop issuing visas on old passports from January or February 2020.

How To Apply For The E-Passport

There are many horror stories about e-passport application hence I have been reluctant to apply for one. The looming deadline finally pushed me to apply this week and the process was not as painful as reported. I now realise that many people are horrible at following directions hence the issues coming up. Below is a step by step guide on how to apply for the E-Passport.

NOTE: the procedure below is for those that already have a passport. If you are making an application for a new passport you will need additional documents i.e. your birth certificate and copies of your parent’s id’s.

If you’ve never had a passport you might not be allowed to make an application at the moment (before August 31st 2019) unless you can prove that you urgently need to travel. Those with old generation passports are currently been given priority.

Additionally, if you have a lost or mutilated passport you will need additional documents i.e. sworn affidavit and police abstract for lost passports and written explanation in cases of mutilated passports. So, read up on your requirements.

Steps To Apply

The below is only for those that have an old generation passport that needs to be replaced.

1. First of all go to E-Citizen and read up on all the requirements for the E- Passport. https://immigration.ecitizen.go.ke/index.php?id=4

2. Scan the below documents and have them saved and ready to upload to E-Citizen
a. You ID Photocopy
b. Your Recommenders ID photocopy
c. Previous Passport Copy Last Page
d. Previous Passport Copy 2nd Last Page
e. Previous Passport Copy 3rd Last Page
f. Previous Passport Copy 4th Last Page
g. Marriage Certificate if married

3. Ensure you have the cash to pay for the application. For payments, once can choose between M-pesa, debit card, credit card or prepaid cards. I used M-pesa.

4. The E-passport Kenya prices or fees are below.

  • 32 Pages Ordinary “A” Series Kshs. 4,550
  • 48 pages Ordinary “B” Series Kshs. 6,050
  • 64 Pages Ordinary “C” Series Kshs. 7,550
  • East African Passport Kshs. 990
  • Diplomatic passport (48 page) Kshs 7,550
  • Mutilated Passport Kshs 10,050
  • Lost Passport Kshs 12,050

5. Go to E-Citizen and log in if you have an account or create an account if you don’t have one https://www.ecitizen.go.ke/

6. Click on services: then click on immigration: then click in Passport application for adults or for children depending on your age.

7. Read the instructions on the application page then make the application online by filling in the ecitizen application form

8. Upload all the required documents

9. Make the payment

10. Print out the application form (1 Copy)

11. Print out the receipts (3 copies)

12. Take the application form to your recommender to sign

13. Do not write in or sign the application form. Just carry a pen with you and you will sign it on the day you submit it at Nyayo house.

E-Passport Requirements

14. Prepare the below documents for submission at Nyayo House or to whichever immigration office you are going to
a. An eCitizen pre-filled passport application form
b. Three copies of the E-citizen receipt or invoice.
c. Original birth certificate and photocopy. (actually they didn’t ask us for these but just carry it! Better safe than sorry)
d. Original National ID Card & a copy.
e. Three Current passport size photos.
f. Recommenders ID Card copy. (its not that serious, get another Kenyan that isn’t your relative to endorse you. What you will need is a copy of their ID)
g. Old passport for replacement plus copies of last three pages.
h. Parents National ID cards copies or Death Certificate if deceased. (this was also not asked for but just carry in case! Better safe than sorry)
i. For Lost case a Sworn affidavit and a police abstract are required
j. For Lost cases and Mutilated cases an explanation letter is required to explain the circumstances of the loss or mutilation

Please have all the required documents with you. Missing one will cost you time as you will have to go outside to make a copy or whatever and your ticket number will be skipped while you’re out there like the 5 foolish virgins

Procedure At Nyayo House When Submitting The Passport.

1. Arrive by 5am; they only serve the first 400-600 applicants so the earlier you get there the better. I got there by 5:30am and there were around 200 ladies ahead of me
2. Before you go through the security check you will stand in separate queues for men and women
3. Once you go through security check you will form one line inside nyayo house at which point you will be given ticket numbers. Those that don’t get a ticket number will be asked to come back another day
4. Once you get a ticket it is now a waiting game to see an immigration official to submit your documents and then to get your biometrics and picture taken. I got there at 5:30am, I saw an immigration official at 08:30 am and I was processed and out by 9:30am.
5. You will receive a message from E-Citizen saying your application has been received. Now you wait for your e-passport to come out.

E-passport Centres in Kenya

Currently you can make your application at centres in the below towns:

1. Nairobi
2. Kisumu
3. Mombasa
4. Nakuru
5. Embu
6. Kisii
7. Eldoret

E-Passport Application For Kenyan Diaspora

For those in the diaspora the below centres are open for passport applications

1. Berlin
2. Paris
3. London
4. Washington DC
5. Dubai
6. Johannesburg
7. Beijing

E-Passport Processing Time

For those replacing old passports the processing time for an epassport is about 10 days.

E-Passport Kenya Collection

Once your passport is ready you will receive a text advising you to go and collect it. I got my notification 6 weeks after I made the application. I then had to make a collection appointment online on E-Citizen. You will need to carry your ID, Old Passport and the receipt which was given to you when you made the application. I saw people still coming as early as 5am to pick up their passports because there are very long queues and you might wait for hours if you arrive late.

That’s all folks, easy and straightforward. Let me know in case of any questions.

THE OLD MONEY BOOK BY BYRON TULLY

OVERVIEW

This was a very short and easy read just as the author had intended. It is intended for people that want to emulate the lifestyle of the traditionally rich American people and would be most useful for young people starting out e.g. 16 to 19 year olds. I do wish I had read, understood and applied it while I was younger but I still at my 36 years of age picked up a few useful titbits.

OLD MONEY CORE VALUES

Firstly, the author highlights the 7 key values of old money people which are in order

1. Health,
2. Education,
3. Strong work ethic,
4. Etiquette and manners,
5. Financial independence,
6. Family and marriage,
7. Privacy.

Of these I have four as my core values but I will now prioritise all these to be my core values adding an eigth one
8. Spirituality.

Memorable quotes

1. Don’t sleep with men that aren’t gentlemen.
2. Financial Independence is being able to wake up every morning and do what you want to do.
3. Live simply and focus on being and doing more than spending and having.
4. Old Money is being an investor not a consumer
5. Live efficiently and quietly with joy, passion and excitement
6. To live within your means shows that you know yourself. There is no dignity as impressive as living within your means
7. If you only use something once a year or less think about why you are buying it.
8. Don’t buy furniture and household items at retail
9. Less Stuff More Room.
10. Plan for your children’s education even before they are born

Lessons Learned from the Book

1. Find a mentor
2. I currently have enough free time to discover what I enjoy doing both as a vocation and hobby. It would have been awesome to discover this earlier.
3. Prepare a will now and say what needs to be done with your property and body and also what to do in case of life support.
4. Dry brush my body
5. Mascara, eyeshadow and lipstick are sufficient makeup
6. Be calm when investment opportunities arise. If you miss out on this one another will surely come. I wish I knew this earlier before making some unfortunate investments
7. Old money people think very little about cars and don’t buy them new
8. Plan travel in advance and travel for the experience and to learn the culture
9. When choosing a home look at safety, affordability, cleanliness, and neighbourhood. Consider neighbourhood before the house itself better a substandard house in a nice neighbourhood than a nice house in a substandard neighbourhood
10. For décor display your hobbies e.g. for me it would be great movies, cities, books.

Summary

In summary the book was quite entertaining and enlightening but it would be extremely useful for younger people starting out as it would prevent them from making some costly investment mistakes.

THE BELLY FAT CURE DIET BY JORGE CRUZ

It appears that there are other belly fat books by Jorge Cruz as this one was a very short read and he kept referring the reader to check out his other books for some more information. Anyway this was still good enough and I picked up on some good information particularly from the interviews he has done with experts located at the end of the book.

Main Points

1. Weight gain is caused by excess carbohydrates and sugar so consume less than 120g of carbs and 16g of sugar daily.
2. Only count your carbs and sugar consumption not calories
3. A great snack is Dark Chocolate (75% and above) and Red Wine (Cabernet). Mmm I can imagine a combination of the two.

Lessons Learned

1. I now only eat whole foods not processed foods. My daily diet consists of legumes, vegetables, eggs, water and meat when the budget allows
2. I don’t eat wheat, sugar or dairy. One expert advised readers to stay away from foods made from flour and sugar.
3. Previously I thought I could eat as many vegetables and legumes as I wanted (following slow carb diet by tim Ferris) but I wasn’t losing weight. I think it may be because legumes and vegetables do have a lot of carbs so now I am counting the amount of carbs I eat even though the source is healthy
4. From one of the interviews I learned that I need to become the kind of woman that the kind of man I am looking for is interested in if I don’t want to end up alone at my 36 years of age 😊
5. There is a correlation between dishonesty and ill health. For optimum health be honest about who you are and what you have and you will live with less stress and ill health
6. No matter your financial situation keep your health insurance up to date

Summary

I think the book was good for me it was eye opening in terms of showing me how many carbs I was eating and that I need to reduce my carbs and increase my proteins. This may be challenging due to budgetary constraints but for the time being im eating a lot of eggs and omena to keep up my protein intake. I’ll come back with an update weekly to show if this diet works for me.

4 Hour Body by Tim Ferriss

4 Hour Body is a book that is almost a decade old yet I only recently heard of it from a Tom Bilyeu video that I was watching. Tim Ferriss is a popular figure amongst millennials due to ground-breaking advice he offers through his podcasts, articles and books. I have never really read or applied anything of his, but he has been in my field of consciousness. I got an electronic copy of the book which many have referred to as an encyclopaedia on the human body. Its over 800 pages long and Tim recommends that one only reads the chapters relevant to their situation.

My first question was what a four-hour body is. Is it a body you get while working out 4 hours a week, 4 hours a month, 4 hours forever? Tim clarifies by saying that by following his guidelines you will get an amazing figure just from working out 4 hours in a month. Yep, this book is a hacker’s quick guide to achieving the best results in health, sex, sleep with the minimum amount of required effort.

Summary

For me, the most important part of the book was the slow carb diet recommended by Tim which he summarised as:

  1. Avoid White Carbohydrates (Wheat, Rice, Corn, Oats e.t.c)
  2. Stick to the same few meals over and over again
  3. Don’t drink Calories (Stick to water, black, sugarless coffee and tea)
  4. No Fruits
  5. One Binge Day per week

Simple enough to follow. The hard part for me to swallow was staying away from oats and brown rice and understanding the instructions for the cheat day. In fact, while the diet plan is straight forward, I found the rest of the book painful to read and hard to understand as Tim uses lots of technical terms and recommends items not easily available to poor old me in Kenya. Some of his stories and anecdotes were a bit cringey… especially the chapter on sex.

Conclusion

All in all this was an interesting read as one can discover the most effective diets, exercises, sex techniques etc as a lot of research has gone into this work both on Tim himself and on hundreds of test subjects. Unfortunately, a lot of the information is very technical and probably only actionable by someone with a coach that understands the science. The diet itself is easy to follow and I like the main premise of the book which is that you have to take personal responsibility for your health and track your results. When you master your physical self you can master everything else.